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Unmother

Please note: This was a post I have struggled to publish. I have not used this blog too often to put too much personal information out there, but after studying about  unity and maturity in the body of Christ  through Ephesians, I knew I needed to be authentic. I hope you accept the following with open arms, knowing that I am bearing my very soul to you.Not many people know the struggle that I have faced, but I am beginning to realize that it's important to share in each other's burdens . SO here I bear my burdens, sharing with you in my heartache, that I might also encourage you, bearing your burdens as my own. Today is Mother's Day. Growing up, I never dreamed that this day could be associated with anything but happiness, joy, and thankfulness. When we experienced the miscarriage of our only baby on October 31st 2014, bracing myself for Mother's Day was something I didn't think to do. With the pain of my loss and everything on my plate with Christmas j...

A New Chapter in Faith

We visited a revival at a friend's church a few years ago. The preacher was praying in the mist of a Spirit-filled alter call. My mind was bombarded with the words of my OBGYN ( you can read my struggle here ) and when the Spirit moved within me, my heart began to cry out for God to answer my many prayers. My soul had felt so heavy at the thought that my dreams might never be realized. I wanted to be a mom more than anything and I was processing the fact that it was possible I may never hold my very own offspring in my arms. I was heartbroken, depressed and longing to hear from God.  And that's when He spoke to me, clear as day, loud and strong. I wasn't in the altar, but He met me where I was. "I hear your prayers and I know your heart. You will give birth to a child.  It will be your own flesh and blood.  Have faith in Me. You will be a mom." God answered me. He answered ME. Who am I that He thought enough of me to let me hear His voice? Who...

Project Semicolon : Revision

REVISED- well, because my story isn't over yet... I was recently introduced to ProjectSemicolon through Instagram. It's important to raise awareness to the issues of mental health and I support anyone trying to make a difference when it comes to depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. We have always heard the side of the media, but have you ever heard about it in church? Growing up, mental health was something that wasn't really discussed in my church. I grew up thinking that if you had "stinkin' thinkin'" (as I've heard a popular preacher say), that you just weren't as in tune to the Lord as you should be. I've read books that talked about the war in our minds and the power we have to change the way we think. Most everything pointed to it being the problem of the individual and how close their relationship to God was. It wasn't until I entered college that I noticed some changes in my mind. My hormones had definitely shifte...